Bring the family
We had an interesting little outing on Sunday. (I know, I'm blogging out of order. You'll get over it.) It has become a tradition for Yau Neih and I to "explore" on Sunday afternoons. (If it happens once, it's happenstance; twice, it's a coincidence; thrice, it's a tradition.) It springs from the fact that there's no map of the city bus routes and I can't read any of the signs here. I figured I could just ride a bus and follow it's route on the street map I do have. Then I could write down the route for myself and know which bus to take if I wanted to travel anywhere. So, for the past three Sundays we've hopped a bus and rode it to where it led. On the first Sunday, we got off at what we thought was the end of the line (it seems that the busses actually do a loop rather than follow one road back and forth) and then had a pleasant stroll along some unfamiliar streets. This has become the more appealing part of our explorations.
Anyway, this week I was hoping to catch a bus route that ventured to the south part of town. We hopped a #11 bus and soon found out that it pretty much was a reverse of the #9 route which we took two weeks ago. That was a bit disappointing, but I decided to make some proverbial lemonade. We got off the bus at a particular intersection and headed south on foot. This was a road which we had followed for a couple of blocks back in our early days here. ("Early days"! I'm talking like we've been here for three decades rather than three months.) The road had started to become a residential thoroughfare, so at the time we turned back. This time, we decided to follow it through. According to the map, it curved around and joined up with another road which we had followed to a gate. A number of places here seem to have guarded gates on one end of the property but are completely open on the other end. So off we went, in search of a "back door".
The road ran much as I remembered. A block or two of shops, then mostly apartment complexes. (Oh, and the city government buildings.) The road made a couple of curves, getting thinner all the time. That's what a lot of the older roads seem to do, they narrow from two lanes to one and finally the pavement gives up and you're walking on dirt. Anyway, the pavement was still going strong when we saw another gate. It wasn't the same complex--this one was a bit older--but it was an obstacle nonetheless. There was a small roadway that looped around the brick wall, so I assumed that it was the "road" on the map. We veered off down that and as we rounded the corner we saw the end of the cement. The tire ruts quickly became a footpath. I should mention that some of the roads on my map have yet to be built.
We continued to follow the path as it hugged the wall. It turns out that the south section of what I thought was "town" is actually comprised of a bunch of gardens. Or maybe they're small farms. I don't know. So much of my thinking is still American so I view everything I see through that lens. Whatever they were, it was a nice place to stroll through. We saw a few people working their gardens as we passed. Eventually the path veered away from the wall. It turned out that we were atop a hill and before us lay a valley. A gorgeous vista of small houses and green fields. You just gotta love hill country. Anyway, the path headed downward and we followed it. In the distance we could see the road to which we had originally hoped to connect. Our path didn't lead there--at least not directly. We headed downhill and soon came to a crossroads of sorts. We could north, back towards home, or venture further south. As we stopped to consider or options, a man passed by heading that way. We smiled and gave him a quick "ni hao!" We decided to head a little further south. We strolled along chatting and enjoying the scenery. After a bit we came to a fork in the trail and paused to consider our options. As we walked we had caught up to the man and he turned around and tried to talk to us. We tried to tell him that we didn't speak Chinese, but he continued his efforts, tossing in an English word or two. He seemed to be inviting us to his home. We wavered on what to do, but then when he said "Come! Sit!" we thought, "What the heck, let's go for it."
We followed him along the downward trail, passing among the different plots. The man greeted his neighbors as we passed. There seemed to regard us with slight amusement, though I have no idea what they were saying to each other. We finally came to a small house at the end of the path, set alongside a couple of fishponds. The house itself was set a bit below the path and there was an attachment--like a wood shack, really--up at path level. He ushered us into the shack where another man and a couple of women were sitting. They greeted us warmly and poured us some tea and offered us candy, peanuts and some fruit. They also offered me a smoke, but I declined. They also called in the rest of the family--a younger man and woman and a school age boy. From what I could gather, the younger woman was the daughter of our host and his wife. The younger man was her husband, and they had a baby of their own. (The baby was asleep in a basket throughout the whole experience, so she doesn't count.) The boy was the son of the other couple. I pulled an old picture of Ga Dai and Siu Wan out of my wallet and we passed that around. About the best we could do, conversation-wise, was to tell that those kids were our daughters and that Yau Neih taught at the Education College. Then we sat and smiled and drank our tea as the family talked amongst themselves. The younger man and daughter soon went back to their work. Despite the language barrier, though, it was quite pleasant just being in a congenial atmosphere, enjoying the breeze coming through the windows and listening to the pigs and rooster making noise out back. After about a half hour or so, Yau Neih and I decided we should leave. The boy had brought his fishing pole and was fishing out of the window. I suspect he was angling so they could add two more places for dinner.
This kind of illustrates the discomfort we have with the Chinese style of hospitality. We feel guilty accepting such a welcome from total strangers. I mean, it's bad enough that they invited us to "set a spell". We're so time oriented that we're not used to making time for casual relationships. If we had been out shopping or taking care of some other business, we probably would never had accepted the invitation. (Heck, it takes effort to expand our normal "Hi!" to a one minute conversation.) But then, to not only have the pleasure of our host's company but to be fed and offered dinner as well, that's really heading deep into foreign culture for us. We left there wishing we could have offered something in return. Next time we go out strolling we'll have to bring housewarming gifts with us, just in case.
posted by John @ 7:16 AM
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